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Saturday, November 17, 2018

Complaint: Sports Mixtures

Dear Cadbury's

There is an argument at the age of 38 and with several fillings and a few teeth missing, that I should have learnt my lesson and stopped eating sweets.

But stuff that.  Life is short and I love sugar.

And Sports Mixtures are one of my favourite sweets - that and Tangfastics, I find hard to go a day without one.  Or two.  Or three.  And I wonder why I'm fat.

Anyway, before I bore you rigid about my new weight-loss plan that will never work, I would like to make a complaint about Sports Mixtures.

Normally they are awesome -80% of the time, the pack is fresh, squidgy and fruity.

But occasionally, around 20% of the time and this is not a new thing, they are really hard, ugly and dry...a bit like me on a Monday.

Why is this?  This has been happening for years - since Lions used to produce them.  It is like some packs get freshly made sweets, and others get dry sweets that have been left on the side for weeks.

I should have kept the most recent packet that this happened with, but am happy to inform you when it next happens - it happens roughly one in every 5 packs.  Maybe a little less frequent.

I hope you can find out why this is happening, and fix it.

Kind regards
James

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Dear James Winfield,

Thanks for getting in touch with us; we want our consumers to always enjoy our products. Please be assured that any changes to products are implemented only after very thorough research and evaluation, and we are sorry that on this occasion you are disappointed.

We have made a small change to the proportions of the ingredients we use in our Sports Mix sweets; the new blend of ingredients also means that our Sports Mix sweets will have a softer texture, something that we know from feedback, our customers would prefer, while still having the same great taste.

Again, we are sorry that the change to the product does not suit your taste, and please be assured that your comments have been duly noted, and will be shared with the relevant colleagues.

Kind regards,

Consumer Relations Team

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Not even a voucher for a new pack.

Friday, November 16, 2018

Something Must Change

I have had enough.  And I am not talking about Brexit.

The Metropolitan line has become so bad that I'm getting home close to 8pm.  Today, I was on a tube stuck outside Harrow-On-The-Hill, awaiting a platform as both northbound platforms were occupied by other trains.  Neither of which apparently had a driver.  Fucking brilliant.

A good 15-20 minutes just stuck there, going nowhere, until the train finally moved, so I could then sit on the platform for a while and wait for my end destination train to arrive - which was stuck outside awaiting a platform.  Plus a bit of earlier slowness due to a signal failure.

At the moment, I am getting out of bed at 6:30am and getting home at 7:45pm, on average.

This is a long day.  I am tired.  I am drained.  I almost want to just say "fuck it" and quit my job.

Which would be stupid.  I actually really enjoy my job - the working part is great - I still pinch myself sometimes when I remember the shit I used to do for work.  I'm challenged every day, I am learning so much - I have great colleagues and an excellent manager.  I do get paid a relatively shit wage, and they do ask me to do things I hate like going to Luton - or go flyering - which is due to be timed for the next Beast From The East - like...fuck off.  But the work itself - it was my dream, and it is perfect.

I see what you are saying.  Why don't I move house?

I currently live by myself.  I definitely will not get such a good deal elsewhere (Brexit?).  Is it worth the pain and the long days?  I'm not sure.

I actually had a look for rooms this morning, a bit closer to work - not hugely but enough to get me off the Metropolitan line, without using a sweatbox line either.  But all the half-decent rooms were at least £100 more than I pay now.  I need to reduce costs.  Not increase them.

Also playing into this is the ridiculous amount of weight that I've put on.  Almost every week I hit a new highest weight.  My belly has become ridiculous.  Sometimes people overtake me when I'm walking.  I almost waddle occasionally.  My ankles ache under the weight sometimes.  It isn't far off 20kg that I've put on from just before I started this job.

Sometimes I look at fat people and imagine saying to them, "go on a fucking diet".  Then I remember I'm fat.  Obese, actually.

It isn't so easy though.  Last week I was refreshed after a week off, and managed to go 4 days of proper healthy eating.  I lost a little weight.  Then I drank on Friday night, ate too much food, and ended up consuming 5,000 calories (not an unusual amount for me when drinking).  Saturday I felt crap so needed comfort food.  Sunday too, though less.  Monday I went to Luton and we ate shit food for lunch - I got home late and just had junk food.  Tuesday I felt shit and ate loads.  And on...I should be able to reverse the pattern tomorrow - as I can relax and have a lay down if I feel tired - not having to shove something sugary down my throat just to give me some very temporary psychological benefit.

All being well, I will start next week being healthy - until something goes wrong.  I'm so mentally weak when it comes to controlling my eating at the moment.  The slightest thing - just waking up in the morning not having had enough sleep is enough to mean the whole of the rest of the week eating unhealthily.  One bad day and I cannot catch up with myself, as I'm working these long hours and getting home at silly times, and always being tired.

So I've had my moan.  I've set out what is wrong.  I wouldn't be me if I didn't have a plan to fix my problems.  I just haven't quite decided on that plan yet.  And no it doesn't fucking involve exercise - I DO NOT HAVE THE TIME OR ENERGY.

Right.

If I'm going to move house then I need more money.

There are only two ways of increasing my salary - a promotion or a new job.  I don't want to do the latter.  But I've proven myself and there is still no promotion.  Maybe it will happen in the next few months.  Maybe it won't.

Until I decide that, then there is no point in looking for somewhere else to live.  I could move house to somewhere more convenient for my current job, then still not get a promotion and get offered a job in west London - I'd then have another long commute.  As dumb and pointless as Brexit.  Actually nowhere near as dumb, but you get me.  Booyakasha.

I actually updated my CV last weekend.  Amazing what being told to go to Luton on a Monday, not long after learning of the upcoming flyering, can do.  I still don't want to have to go ahead with it.  I'm nothing as a human being if I'm not loyal.  But maybe I should be more selfish.

It isn't an easy decision to make.  But something has to change - such long days give less meaning to my existence.

Also in January my new detox starts.  90 days and 90 kg.

Which will be a minimum of 90 days without alcohol, but also reaching a minimum weight of 90kg.  I'm currently 103.5kg and this year I lost 6-7kg during my detox (put 13 back on) so extrapolating this could mean 6 months of no drinking.  Which as you can imagine, I don't want.  The theory being that I subsequently put more effort in before my detox starts, so I'm not sat in a Spanish piazza in May drinking agua.

And if I put weight back on after my detox like I did this year, then I'm going to punish myself with vegan roast dinners.


Something has to change.  I have to change.  As much fun as I've had this year, as much as I really do enjoy my job - I cannot continue on this current path.

Therefore my main goal for next year, one that I hope to achieve in the first few months, is to gain back at least one hour a day of my life.

Time to take back control.

ps Apart from the above, it has been the best year for years.  I'm trying my hardest to be miserable right now, but failing.  I'm still happy.

Saturday, November 10, 2018

Complaint: Mouldy Tomatoes

Hey Sainsbury's, how's life?

We haven't spoken for a while, which for most people other than my mum, is probably a good thing.  Definitely for you, as it means I have something to moan about and then you have to spend time refunding me the half a cucumber or whatever it is that I am moaning about.  Though the Metropolitan line is taking the brunt of my moaning capacity at the moment.

My lack of contact means that I'm either too busy or I'm happy, and until this delivery I was both.

Only one issue, the tomatoes - very nice but expensive tomatoes, had a huge patch of mould on them when I opened them.

They were dated 8th November, but when I opened them on 6th November I noted the mould.

That's all.

I will leave it with you, and may I take this opportunity to wish you not only a Merry Christmas, but also a Happy Easter, in the hope that I won't have need to write to you before then - I barely have time to text my grandma let alone complain to you.

All the best
James

(random image stolen from the internet)

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Thank you for getting in touch and letting us know about this.  I apologise that the tomatoes were delivered with mould on them, I have reported this to the store so they have been made aware they were delivered like this.  I have refunded the tomatoes back on to the account.

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I think our loving relationship is over.  I didn't even get a "Dear James" from them.